#274 The Joke Man Jackie Martling

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Jeff Dwoskin 0:28

All right, Nancy, thank you so much for that amazing introduction. You get the show going each and every week, and this week was no exception. Welcome, everybody, to Episode 274 of classic conversations. As always, I am your host, Jeff Dwoskin. Great to have you back for what's sure to be a sidesplitting episode for the ages. Jackie the joke man martling is back for his fourth triumphant visit to classic conversations. You loved him in Episode 1843 101. And now he's back in episode 274. We're talking all about his new documentary joke, man. And that's coming up in just a few seconds. And in these few segments I want to name drop Ellison our groom my guests last week, Nellie from Little House on the Prairie an amazing chat. Do not miss that one. But right now get ready for the return of Jackie the joke man martling. The greatest joke teller ever you loved him on Howard Stern, great storyteller so much coming up are right now. All right, my next guest, a fixture on The Howard Stern Show for 18 years author of joke man bow to stern, currently starring in a documentary of his life, you may know from all those things you may know him likely from the three other times he's been on this podcast. Welcome to the show. Jackie the joke, man martling. What's up, buddy?

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 1:57

What the hell are we going to talk about? We did this three times already?

Jeff Dwoskin 2:00

I know. Well, you know, but I gotta support ya. You got this new movie, which I've now I've seen twice. By the way. It's great. You know,

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 2:08

I love when somebody says they've seen it twice. But how could I possibly check up on that? You know, it's like when somebody says they've read a book by somebody added know, how do you know? But I trust you, you and thank you. Thank you for saying if you're lyin Jeffrey, thank you

Jeff Dwoskin 2:24

now lying, I would have just kept it to one and then. But the No, you shared it with me a while ago, the documentary a long time it just came out I think but you shared it with me a long time because I watched it then. And then I watched it again, knowing we were going to chat again and kind of let the world know about it.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 2:42

I appreciate that. I hate to you know, we're all so superstitious, or at least I am. But by all accounts, it's doing really, really well. And an incredible amount of the people that I'm doing podcasts and doing radio interviews, they all watched it. You know, a lot of these people, you know, hey, you got to see Jackie's this, that or the other thing and then the like, you know, someday I'll get to it. But they've all seen it. And they're all raving and it's it's very heartwarming, I might get famous just in time to die.

Jeff Dwoskin 3:14

Well, some people don't even do that. Well, I'll say this about the documentary. One, it's a tight, like, hour, 20 minutes, something just under that. So I think when people see that they go, I can I can do this. And it's entertaining immediately. So to me, like a lot of times when you watch something, if it grabs you, you'll keep watching it. Otherwise, I just watched just enough so I can pretend to talk to you about it. You know, like, Oh, I'll reference something. I'll reference something and you're like, don't realize it was all within the first five minutes. Right? Right.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 3:48

Like a book report where you reference like chapter nine. Oh, my favorite part was?

Jeff Dwoskin 3:55

So Jackie, what led to making the documentary like what after writing the book, like what was the process of just documenting your life,

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 4:03

I always thought that my stupid trail was interesting. And I was trying to get the book out for so long. And I hit so many songs, I had so much interest, but then dead ends. You know, I wasn't hitting dead ends. I was hitting people that were really interested in really trying to do stuff, and then having a full off which is probably worse than having people just say stop. And then I got approached after I was off the show by some guys who had a great company and they wanted to do it. They came in videotaped a lot of stuff and it was really fun. But they had a weird tack. And my partner from the radio I did a radio show on Howard went on to one for eight years. And my partner in the radio is a great production company ik a collective they do stuff to the network center and to promote books and TV shows. And he's been at it for a long time and he didn't like to tack they would take it because they were taken attack of Jackie's time out there, and he's done a lot of stuff. But What a moron for leaving that show and the inset, he thought there was a lot more to me than just leaving that show, you know, I had crazy life before the crazy life after and he said, Let's start over. And we just started working on we had so much fun, it takes so much time I of course, I was totally into it, because it's a strange thing to do a documentary about yourself. But I really think a lot of us they just like my stupid jokes. You know, I really think they're funny. I think a lot of stuff in my life is interesting, not because it's me, just because they think it's interesting. But it took so much time. I mean, Willie Nelson was fully into being in it from the word go, and it still took a year to try and cross paths and find him. And even to do it, we had to fly to New Orleans, you know, so things took time. And then the pandemic, of course, pulled the rug out of everybody. And to this day, Jeff, as I'm talking to you, I cannot believe that damn thing is done and out and up for grabs on the internet. It's available on iTunes, and, and Amazon and all these places. After two days, we were the number four documentary on iTunes. And it was like, pinch me, because even after all that time, and you're finally done with a documentary, and you get a distributor, even if you get a distributor, it's six months, until it's in the system where people can see it. And who would know that I would think if they say, yeah, we'll take it, boom, it's up the next day. But that's not how it works. And I told the and I only have one request is that this thing comes out before I die. And he did it. He fulfilled my my wishes. It wasn't one of those things where I went through my life said, Hey, maybe someday we'll make a movie. The one thing I really do wish, though, I got so many what I think a really great movie ideas. And a lot of people have told me when people see this, you're gonna get calls, like you got any more ideas, you got any more ideas, you know, because they're gonna see you, you know, they see all that crap that's in this in this room, and they're like, maybe this guy's got something to offer, you know, so we'll see, you know, and you will be the co star, I told you that you will be the co star of the movie, whatever movie we'll make. I'm counting on your the 400 and 50th.

Jeff Dwoskin 7:16

I'll take it Jackie Bennett, one of the interesting things, you know, talking about the negative slant that those other folks were taking with, and I know you get the question a lot like about leaving the Howard Stern Show after so long and stuff like that. But what's interesting in the documentary is that when you did leave, and I think it was your ex wife that was talking at this point where it helped you kind of stopped drinking it. I think you eventually got divorced, but it helped that relationship even because that was it, it actually your life, your life, your literal life got better.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 7:48

Well, after a bump, you know, it was a it was a healthy bump in the road, because I moved into a house by myself and got divorce and quit drinking and was without a job all at the same time. And they say if you do any one of those things, don't change anything else, because it's gonna be such an adjustment period. And I did them all at the same time. And it was really, really crazy. But they were all intertwined. Like Nancy and I still loved her. She I mean, she's the greatest, you know, everybody, oh, she kept your money, she did not take half my money. She took the half that she earned. She was reading the map while I was driving the car, you know what I mean? She enabled everything. So she deserved everything she got, we were basically living together. We weren't divorced, because there was no time I'd be working all week on the radio. And when it came to the weekend, and I go off to work in Chicago, or go to Las Vegas, or go to Nashville or something. When I finally had a weekend off, the last thing I was gonna do was go looking for a bachelor apartment where I could have a hot plate, you know, I'm like, I'm not leaving here. And I'm not kicking her out. We just coexisted. And it's not like we're battling. It's just like we were kind of divorced already. And you know, of course, everybody's like, Oh, the minute you lost your job, then she left you, you know, you don't have stern people who are how a lot of regular people are. And I also knew there was no way to quit drinking, because I was working so damn hard. If you were going to tell me that I wasn't gonna be able to drink to celebrate what's going on. It was not even in the cards to even think about, you know, until I get off the show. And then after I was off the show for a month, I was like, Whoa, I cannot spend the rest of my life waiting for it to be five o'clock so I can start drinking. The only solution was to have it never be five o'clock and I just did it. That was 22 years ago, Jeff 22 years ago, if you had told me I wasn't gonna have a drink for 22 days, I would have laughed in your face like what are you out of your mind? I mean, the concept was not it the concept didn't exist in my brain, you know, and then I just did it and and you do it and and things just get better and better. better, I hardly even smoke pot anymore. I think I'm officially becoming an old man. I mean, I smoke a little pot here and there, you know, but I'm just enjoying myself. You know, my, like, before we did this phone call, I did like an hour swim in the sound and it's just, it's just so rejuvenating. And it's just good. You know, it's just, it's a nice life, except for when I'm miserable. It's a very nice life. You know what I'm talking about?

Jeff Dwoskin 10:25

For sure, Jackie? Do you ever think about or do you talk to people about because when I hear you tell that story, I think about it encapsulates to me like the the concept of sometimes you think you have something so great, but you have to step away from it for your own health, your own well being. And that's okay to do you mean like leaving the show? Well, yeah, I mean, like, staying with the show. It sounds my intention.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 10:50

It's very, it's a very strange situation. Because I'm a stubborn guy. And I always have been, I walked off the Howard Stern Show, at least three times before the last time when they didn't call me back. It might have been four, but three times where I took my football and I went home, because they weren't coming up with the money. People always laugh for me. But it's not just about the money. It's about fairness. And I felt like I was so underpaid for what I was doing. And I held out and then they give me the money because Howard would say, I really need you. And I'm like, well, that's why I'm asking for money. Because I know you really need me. You know what I mean? I'm not just doing it because I want to sit in a corner and pout, you know, I'm really being an asset. I mean, this whole conversation didn't take places in my head. But you know, I know what an asset I am. You know, at one point, stop me if I told you this already. But I had been off the show for a couple of weeks. And this lawyer friend of ours, Dominic Barbara, who always got made fun of on the show dominant Barbara Yeah, it was one of those guys that the minute that was a horrendous stupid thing that happened in New York City, you knew you're gonna pick up the New York Post in which they defended by Dominic Barbara, you know, he's one of those characters. And he called me up and said, said he got to the back of the show, they really need to get into the show, club, maybe I can help. I mean, I can talk to Mel Karmazin was the main guy to talk to Mel, what are we talking about here? And he said, Well, you know, Dominic, I want more money. I'm getting Negan 300 grand, and I want 400. He said, I thought of the pull over, I gotta pull over. He couldn't believe it. Because he thought he said Everybody thought I was like making a million or a million half dollars, and that I was holding out for $2 million, or two and a half million dollars. He said, you're talking about 100 grand, you're you're not on that show, because and I said I'm not making that up. And he could he could not believe that. And that was in the early 90s. I was never asked him for money that was in the planets, you know, and even this time, I wasn't looking to quit the show. But I was ready to leave when needed if I needed to. There was enough wrong in my life. I don't know you're a comic, if somebody I've probably told you this on the air before. But if somebody calls up and says, Do you want to do a gig in Alaska? You don't say no, you say I'll do it for $45,000. And then they laugh at you and hang up. But you don't say no, because sometimes they're gonna go alright, we'll give you the 45 Grand you say you know what, for that money, I'll walk through the snow to Alaska, you draw a line in the sand in your head. And the money I was asking for was not like, I want to quit the show money. It was like what I thought I deserved. But I was in enough of the hell that if I couldn't get what I really thought I deserved. I was I was ready to stay home. It's a weird thing. Because after a couple of months, I was freaking out. I said, Hey, I want to come back. It's a very odd situation. You know, I figure I'm gonna leave this show. And I'll just have as much fun anyway. But you don't just find yourself in a room with poor very talented, very funny people for five hours a day, anywhere, but that situation and that's what you miss the endorphins and the rah rah and those the rush of the you know, we'd laugh for four or five hours. And that was, you know, that was something so, so surreal, but you didn't know it. It's like there's a fish. No, it's in water. I didn't realize how incredible that was, you know, of course, a certain amount of people like, Well, I would have done your job for free just to be in that room. I thought, well, you're an idiot, you know, like Mickey Mantle go, you're just playing baseball, you just playing a game, shut up, take whatever they give you. You know, that's not how it works. But it was the whole thing was like a little entwined. But at the end of the day, it was as my boss for more money. And he said no, so I didn't come into work. Of course, it blossomed into this amazing thing, according people, but what the hell, and I quit drinking and I'm still alive, which is a two pretty big deals.

Jeff Dwoskin 14:43

Yeah, I'd say. I'd say we won't. We won't put it put them in any particular order. But yeah, they're both good deals. I did Alaska once for 50 grand. So I understand. I'm totally getting what you're saying. Okay, good. You know, I think the message here too, is where I think people would I completely understand what you're saying is, anytime somebody is a high contributor in their job, whatever that job is, if they feel they're not being either compensated, or given the credit for what they're bringing to the table, you know, they would feel the same way as you. And anyone who has ever been in that situation and hears your story 100% understands exactly what you're saying, it's, I think it's the people that have never been in the position of making hundreds upon hundreds of 1000s or 10s of 1000s of dollars with the potential of making a million dollars for what they perceive is just sitting there being funny, which not everyone can do. You're a master at, like, those are the messages. I'm just I'm writing your TED Talk, as we go along. Sorry to interrupt, have to take a quick break, I do want to thank you all for supporting the sponsors. When you support the sponsors. You're supporting us here at Classic conversations. And that's how we keep the lights on. And now back to my conversation with Jackie the joke, man martling.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 15:59

Thing is what really confused the situation for many, many, many of the stern listeners is it was not obvious. It's scary. How many people had no idea what I was doing. So here, I think I'm making these major contributions to this show. But they have no idea how much writing I'm doing and how much I've got to deal with how funny Howard is. So they think that like he said, I'm sitting there, and they're making fun of me, and I'm laughing, and I'm trying to be the life of the party, et cetera, et cetera. But they don't see my true contribution. So also, who else here to think that he deserves more money? That's what GM did up a little. And that's what I really liked about the documentary because so many people are saying, Wow, my eyes are open. I, I heard that you were writing some of the stuff. I heard that you wrote a line here and there. It's a whole gamut of reactions from people. You know, I always know it. I never know what and smart people there are slick, because people don't care. If you're watching Johnny Carson, and he says something funny. You don't go. Oh, I wonder who wrote that? Right. Johnny Carson? Why don't I date myself when he leaves 40 years ago? The point is that Jared jar? Yeah, that son of a bitch Joey Bishop, I think he crossed it muddles it a little bit. So I understand there, then not knowing. And I love the fact that the people are finding that out, you know, along the way, it was funny, because it was a thing that just kind of more and more people will peeking behind that curtain as time went on. And it was it was very interesting, very interesting.

Jeff Dwoskin 17:32

It was a fascinating part of the documentary. And I can't remember if you talked about in the book or not, I'm sure you did. But what we're talking about here is on the fly, Jackie, in the moments would write down notes as responses and possible quips that could be made by Howard in the moment and then hand them to Howard. And then in the documentary, which I want to talk about poorly separately, the hoarding tendencies of having everything but let's get to that in a second. But I know, to me, it's not even just the fact that you would hand something to Howard, and he would read it, he'd be funny. No one would specifically know it was you. I think it was great. All the people that were recognizing that this was part of them machine that made the show so funny, but to me to watch, and here it is, it's a talent that is beyond like to be able to synthesize the room and the moment jotted down is one thing and to say it is another thing, but the thing that makes you so special is you gave it to somebody else. And I think that's what really makes you unique and super hilarious. You're not only writing on someone else's voice in the moment, but you're being selfless, and handing that to someone else knowing they're gonna get a good laugh, and then become part of it and laugh at it, not just because you wrote it, you know,

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 18:52

that was something like Howard and Robin were a team. And they were a great team. And he was somewhat funny. But there was not room for a third person. There was not room for a three way chat. It was radio, and it was back and forth. So I knew if I wanted to ingratiate myself into this situation, I always tell people, it's like me and Howard and Robin are sitting on a table and we're having a conversation. And I'm a funny guy. So it's like we're having lunch. And he says something, she says something and I say something very funny. Only in this situation. Instead of me saying it. I'm writing it down and putting it in front of him. And he gets more credit than anything in the world because he so seamlessly would work into the conversation. What I wrote, sometimes you would read it cold, you know, I mean, it couldn't have worked with anybody but him. We would just this ridiculous, ridiculous comedy team, but I was hidden. It was just like, what was happening in the room and what would normally come into my head. It was a job I created so it wasn't me being selfless all of a sudden saying you know what, let him get the laughs was like that was the way it happened. That's how it organically happened. It started with a note here and a note there. And we went to mornings and he called me up said, Look, I want to come on two mornings a week, Jeff, in the entire 18 years on that show, this was my complete job description. He called me up I was in Virginia Beach is still remember, he said, listen, we're going to mornings, and I'd like you to give me a price to come on two days a week, and do your thing with the notes. That was my job description. For the eight following 15 years. I said, writer, do your thing with the notes. So I did my thing with the notes almost immediately went to five days a week, because in all fairness, he was a lot funnier on the days I was there. Because it was more minds working doesn't make me special if this robbing an hour and all sudden, he's got a second sense of humor, working hand in hand. Of course, it's going to be funnier. And then Fred, all of a sudden, I'm a conduit for Fred to get no and Sam. And it was, it was the most amazing team. It was just crazy crazy. When I call this the Beatles of radio, everybody gave me a hard time and broke my balls. And especially Howard because the Howard, we were not the Beatles of radio. You know, he was the way Newton radio and we were the backup band, singing behind the drummer. And we knew where that Where did that come from. But it was a one man band. But it wasn't a one man band. We really were the Beatles. It was just very interesting the way the whole thing happened. And I guess when I first started, I think from day one, I wrote those notes. And you wouldn't believe the pile and notes, the crumpled up paper around me so many things I started or he didn't read i i put up however many if I put up 20 things and he used six of them, or 12 of them, whatever, whatever you didn't use out crumpled up and the cutting room floor was always amazing. But right away I the notes that he said I put a piece of paper around it and wrote the date, because that was the only proof of not proof that it was just an existence of my job because there was nothing else to show for what I was doing. So I just thought it was a good idea to save them. I don't even know why. And once I started doing it, I'm such a creature of habit. I just did it and did it and did it five every note except for the couple times when we're on the road and stuff like that. I mean, I got boxes and boxes. If you give me a date, I could just go on my mother's attic and find the date. This happened to me already. Somebody said hey, I got asked to it. It was something that Oh, who's the Kung Fu guy. It was something David Carradine said, I'm sure you wrote it. And he told me what what the date was. And he told me what the line was. And I went and found that date and went through the notes and found that note, I always wondered if I could do that was like, pretty wild. I mean, doesn't mean anything, but it's just kind of fun. You know what I mean?

Jeff Dwoskin 22:54

Well, it's interesting, you bring up some interesting points, which was you know that the way the audience perceived you, they probably thought that was good at the time when they were letting you go. Because why it makes it easier on them. They don't look like the bad guys, Jackie's the bad guy he's leaving, he's being selfish. And again, it goes back though to bosses not treating high contributors well, and then the other thing with you saving the notes, it's something that as I look back on some of the places that I looked where I've made contributions in the corporate world is I wish I had taken better notes and had that documentation of the things that I had done. That's why I was fascinated by it. I thought it was interesting. I think it's cool that you can go back.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 23:37

It was in no way subversive. I wasn't hanging on to him saying nah, someday I'll have proof of it, you know, maybe prove for myself or proof to my offspring, which I never had, or to other people actually have people that are very interested in buying all the notes, these people in San Francisco and they think they can monetize them. And I don't know if they can or even I'm supposed to this point. I don't care. When I think about it. I mean, there was different things like when we go into a whole Ted Kennedy riff or a whole Elvis Presley room, or a would ye that when when the engineer came in and pretended he was Woody Allen and you know these whole segments and then I started thinking back I don't know how long you listen to the show. But when we first started mornings in 1986, we had these oddball sponsors because nobody wanted to sponsor the swap the wall show, and Howard would do live commercials. And we would write the on the fly, right these ridiculous commercials and people using Jesus. Those commercials are as funny as the program. We had Roselli movers in Jan and Craig's window factory and the very beginnings of Snapple and the very beginnings of Nutrisystem and PC Richards and they were very off weird sponsors. The more outside we got, the more fun it was and the more fun Howard can have. Have it and I'm sure those those would be really fun to pull out. You know, the stuff from the really early early years and stuff when we have a special guest. There's a lot in there. I mean, it's like panning for gold. You know, you gotta because most of the stuff, it's like two words, five words, eight words. It's not like jokes, but in the flow of what was going on. They were incredibly Patmos, but they're fairly witty things that just boom, would make people drive off the road. And I would laugh my ass off, not just to pump them up. I would laugh my ass off because I thought it was that funny. Just like my joke. People. Oh, you laugh at your own jokes. I'm laughing at the jokes because they're funny, not just how good they are funny. Yeah, you know? Yeah, it's not my fault. I didn't do it. I didn't do it. Michigan State did it.

Jeff Dwoskin 25:48

Yeah, you can stay. God gave you this talent.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 25:53

She's a switches bigger at this point.

Jeff Dwoskin 25:56

I was, I will say I didn't think you save the notes for any nefarious reasons, I think you'd save them because you're like, Oh, this is going to be forever. And I want to just have a record of all this fun and coolness, you know, it just turned out that it's now a way you can go back and kind of prove out some of the cool things. I love the fact that it's like just words. Because it would be interesting to like, if you knew that that was, you know, the 1982 show, or whatever you have show and it was like this segment and to like be able to listen to the show up to the point where before he does that joke, and look at that, no, then it would have context. And then it would be

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 26:35

you could take the stack of notes from say, August 3 1993, put the stack of notes from that day in front of you, and then play the show. And just listen to the show. And all of a sudden, it'll get to that note and just flip the page. And eventually it'll get to the next note. And sometimes they're a minute apart sometimes at 10 minutes apart, sometimes their rapid fire because people have said why you should just play the show on Youtube and have the video of just the notes being flipped. But I don't own those shows. I can't do that. You know, of course if I wind up getting rid of those notes, then the listeners could do that. I don't know if anybody's that crazed, maybe 20 years ago they would be although it's pretty amazing. The amount of fans there are for the shows from the 90s Everybody's the golden era, the golden era all man I started listening to this third show 19 I mean in 2010, but I now I listened. I just listened to the golden era, the golden era. So maybe there's a whole revival. Who knows? You know, because it's just like the 1927 Yankees the more time goes by the more special they are. You know what I mean? They grow I think they grow bigger. Like the stern Channel Nine shows. People talk about them like we created heaven and earth. Some of them are downright unwatchable. They're horrible. People talk about our Channel Nine, Jim because they were wilder than anything else on the air. And it was regular TV. It wasn't cable, things grow. It's like this whole thing with this guy. Jesus, it got way out of hand that we're in so

Jeff Dwoskin 28:14

now we're gonna get Jackie, talk to me about your friendship with Willie Nelson.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 28:21

Willie Nelson came on the Stern show. And Howard used to read and rail about why these guys had bands like Kiana Reeves or there was a guy in the Buffalo Bills football team. Like all these celebrities, why do they have to have a band or play guitar? Why can't they just be happy being actors. And the truth of it is every actor wants to be a rock star. And every rock star wants to be an actor and every drummer wants to be the lead singer. That's just how it is everybody. Everybody's talents going, you know, why is this? Why did Tony Bennett paint, you know, because they was driven the pain he really did. So how Rael so we created a band and I actually named it we were called the losers, how it played the keyboards and Scott, the engineer played drums and me and Fred would play guitar or bass. You know, we trade off for whatever we wanted to plan with James Brown, James Brown sang a song. And Gary played the trumpet. And he hadn't played his trumpet since third grade. I mean, it was just phenomenal radio and his James Brown just it was like he was performing to 50,000 people he was into it full tilt. And then Willie, I'd always proud Howard didn't want to come out ask him and finally Willie, you want to place all those? Sure. So we played on the road again. And I actually play a lead in it and his men Willie and I got this long. Here's his these 12 Hippies where it just didn't look at at a place or anything. And it was such a good guy, and I beat them in a rolling contests, which was absurd, because we're rolling tobacco big hunks of tobacco. But what I used to do is when we have a celebrity on I would tell Grillo or one of the interns get The information about the celebrity, find out his management, find out where you live, so just get me information. And I would send them my stuff. I would send CDs or whatever I had, because musicians and actors, they all love dirty jokes. I inherently know that from living my life, and being at parties and college and I just know that I've been among the people and I know how much they love it. So I'd send it to everybody. And Jeff was so funny, because people would come back on the show that I had sent stuff to now if somebody came on the show, Howard would never go Clarence Clemons. He wouldn't go Clarence. This is Jackie, and this is Fred, because of the you know, what did they do all their writing? But you know, it was like we didn't exist. But then when these people came on another time, they would forget that they didn't know me, because a God might joke CDs and they laughed loaned me so much. So like Clarence Clemons walks in. Hi, Howard. Hi, Jackie. And Howard, like what Claritin, especially because we did a segment and we took a break, commercial break, and I won't take a leak. And I came back, Howard sitting back in his chair, and Clarence is sitting in and how it goes, Yeah, Clarence is telling me how much fun they have listened to your CDs after the bar closes in Mill Valley. Clouds like, yeah, you're the funniest son of a bitch. Like death to me. So I send all my stuff to Willie Nelson. So this a long story, but I think it's worth it. So I worked at a recording studio in the 70s for odd reasons. And that's a whole nother story. But that's where I recorded the pot song. I don't know if you ever heard Howard going to town on pot song on the radio. He always told me apart from the pot song, which is a song about smoking pot. It's just great, great song. So I sent all my stuff to them. And I worked in a recording studio, and there was a band called Zebra. Have you ever heard of them? No, they were pretty big rock band. They're still around, actually. But they're pretty big and like 1975 78, whatever. And they recorded us a full album at the studio where I work. And when they do that you lock out the studio so nobody else comes in and goes so they leave the stuff set up. So they come in and just start recording. So of course we're in a foxhole for two weeks. So you get pretty close to people. So I love these guys. They love me. I brought one of the guys home for Thanksgiving dinner, you know, one of those deals. So 25 years later, due to the wonderful thing email I got an email from Felix Hanneman, who's the bass player, Jackie, this is Felix from Zebra Do you remember me? And I'm like, What do you mean? Do I remember you? We spent two weeks in a foxhole as well. My girlfriend who's now his wife, my girlfriend massages the Jets and the Giants and Woody Harrelson and Willie Nelson, do you like country music? And I emailed back and go, of course. Well, he's working tonight at Irving Plaza or Wilbur, whatever it was downtown. Why don't we have a beer and then we'll go to Billy's show. So I meet the guy like it's like I saw him yesterday. We have a couple of beers before I quit drinking. And you know, we're having a time of a lifetime. And we got a Willie show and we're up in the top and that is it will be Webster Webster Hall. So we're on like the second floor and Webster Hall. The bathroom is in the basement. So I go all the way down the basement is 1230. And Willie doesn't give any signs that he's going to be stopping anytime soon. And I'm like, You know what? If I go back up there, and we wind up on the bus, and I get stoned, I'm going to miss work. And I'm going to look like an idiot and I blew my chance to get stoned with Willie Nelson walked out and took a cab home now that that's a company man, okay. Two weeks later, it feels like tolls and says, look, we got to try again. Willie's working at Westbury music fair, and he'd really liked to see it. So me and my wife, Nancy, two of the members of the New York Giants and Felix and his wife Lisa go to the concert at Westbury. And it's fantastic and for him when he comes on what running around in the top here of of Westbury music fair looking for a place to smoke pot to the New York Giants and it might have been during the season. I don't remember in a cubby alternate smoke pot. So when he gets done, Willie Nelson and I turns out a lot of country stars. They sign autographs until they get to the last person when he goes out goes in his bus, you know, smokes a joint relaxes for a few minutes then comes out and stands there autographs for everybody until they're gone, which is he's been doing for however many decades. Wow. So we go out there and go to the bus driver sticks his head out. And he says Jackie, you guys, come on Willie. So me and Nancy and Felix and Lisa and these two New York Giants go to the crowd and we go into the bus. And here's Willie Nelson sitting at his little table and And I walk in I'm sitting across from him and I'm this is a pinch me moment. I don't know about you, but this is definitely bucketlist time for me and I'm sitting across Willie, I can't believe it and Nancy and the gang, they're behind me. And this is such a heartbreak. And I said, Willie, I got some great homegrown. It's all sparking up, man. I'm like, Whoa. So I take out big old joint. I swear to you, Jeff and I, this is the hardest part of the story to believe, when he starts looking for a match. And I was flagged, I said, Willie, you've been smoking pot for 50 or 60 years, you've been on this bus for 50 or 60 years, you can't be looking for a match and he starts laughing. So there's all these little tiny drawers in a travel bus like Verband. So I'm pulling open drawers. I swear on my mother, I pull up in a draw. And there's a copy of my CD, hotdogs and doughnuts. And I just can't believe how honored I am. This is Willie Nelson's boss and his dogs and doughnuts, I lift it up, and they're still in the plastic. Like you said, Willie, this just went from being my favorite story to my worst story. Because I know how many times I'm gonna tell this story and you son of a bitch and he's laughing his ass off.

Jeff Dwoskin 36:20

Sad interrupt. Willie lost his match. And we got to find him a new one. And we're back with Jackie the joke man, Marlon and more Willie Nelson stories.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 36:29

And so eventually we find a match and we smoked some pot. And we're laughing and told a few jokes, I'm sure and it's just great. And a couple of weeks later, they have this thing. Sony is doing the thing where people call, they call they doing concerts where people call in or they email or they fat, whatever it was any way you could get a request in. And it was an all request shown as Willie Nelson and Dr. John. And I knew some girls from Sony that invited me. So I went and we wind up on the bus. This is like three or four weeks later, all of a sudden I'm sitting across from Willie Nelson on his bus again. He's like, What are you doing here? Again, I said, I don't know how this happened. But here we are. Let's get stoned. And from that moment on, you know, I've been on the bus six or seven times, I went on the bus and his daughter closed the door and turned off the air conditioner and Amy Nelson videotape men and Willie telling jokes for like 12 minutes, and he's telling me his life story. And then like a couple of years later, me and Ian did it again with his camera that and that's what's in the documentary. But ever since the very beginning, me and Willie Nelson have been emailing back and forth really filthy jokes. I mean, sometimes, you know, once a month, sometimes once every two months, sometimes twice a week, you're just depending he just loves it when email shows up for me because he knows he's gonna laugh and then he sends me back his jokes. It's like E Cummings. You know, it's well, small case and there's no punctuation but it's when he's taking the trouble that type these stupid jokes to me, and it's just so special. And I just I just love that. You know, I was on the stage at Radio City Music Hall at the end of his show. He does like four or five or six gospel songs, you know, will the circle be unbroken and I saw the light you know, one to the other to the other. And I got you know, iPhone video of me standing up there with Amy is his daughter and his his ex wife, Connie and just Willie Nelson's daughter, Amy Nelson has a group called folk you. And it's her and all Guthrie's daughter, Kathy, I mean, you gotta know Arlo Guthrie is of course, right. And they're just delightful. So we did a concert in Austin, it was Willie Nelson, and it was asleep at the wheel. And folk you and me. I'm like, I'm hoping that these country people are going to be able to handle my dirty jokes. You know, what am I going to do? So Amy and Kathy are the opening act, folk puke, and they gonna do their first song and Willie's gonna come up and sing along with them to be supportive, so the audience will take to them. And this song I started with was motherfucker got fucked up and fucked up. His life was vital and the word stuck. And if I said, you know, I think the dirty jokes, and they became great friends, either in the stories about him and go on and on and on. He was thrilled to be in the documentary wine reviews squirrel, who's more than glad to be in the documentary, but we had to chase them all the way to New Orleans. But that we I mean, that was a documentary itself going down there and finding him and getting on the bus, et cetera, et cetera. You know, my dream and somebody in California just proposed this to me out of the blue, he proposed to me what I want to do, he said, Can we show the documentary and maybe then you could get up and tell a few jokes and do a q&a and and talk more about it because the devils in the details and then maybe do a VIP meet and greet? So that's what I want to do. I want to go around the country doing that At because I believe if you've videotaped the q&a, you're gonna get a whole nother documentary because there's so much dickless stuff. And he was all about it, except I don't think we're allowed to show it for a certain amount of time, you know, the distributor has to let it play out on. I don't know, if anybody's making any money, or I'm just thrilled, it's out, I get to talk to you and I get to never shut up. And so I don't know what the question was. But I hope I answered it.

Jeff Dwoskin 40:27

I think I just how are you? And I'm sorry. You mentioned sending Willie Nelson and others, your books and your CDs. So in the documentary, one of the things that you talked about, and I know this is in your book, as well, and this is sort of how you met Howard Stern, you had sent him CDs and stuff like that, and three

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 40:52

LPs, actual LPs, long playing records.

Jeff Dwoskin 40:57

So here's, here's my question as much as you sent stuff out, and it made it seem like you did this a lot. This was a regular thing. How did you afford this? Because this is pre or big fame wasn't

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 41:08

you? You? You have no idea. You have no idea? Well, I started in 1979. I wasn't going to the city and doing seven minutes for a hamburger. From the very beginning. We started comedy on Long Island by putting on a show, you know, I had my amplifier and a couple of speakers and a microphone. And we started the first comedy show on Long Island, which developed into a comedy club. And I was producing shows all over the place all over Long Island. And then a guy from there was another guy doing it in New Jersey, and I had more shows than he had equipment. So I took a couple of his shows. So I was making some money doing that. But then I had the 516922 wind dirty joke line. And these guys in Levittown on Long Island, they were gonna get closed down because the music had gotten too loud bands will get louder and louder. And one of the guys said, Hey, before we close down, why don't we try a comedy show, make a comedy club and somebody said, Well, let's get the guy with the dirty phone joke. It dirty jokes on the phone. So me and Nancy went there and started governor's comedy shop. So we were making a little bit of income from that. But that wasn't till 1981. I'm telling you. And I was doing it before she even came aboard. The records cost money, the postage costs money to things to put the albums and costs money. Every penny I was living in my mother's attic, every penny was going back into it. And I don't even know I had no master plan. I didn't know what I was doing. All I know is my last band broke up. I knew I wasn't gonna get a job. The only thing I had was my dirty jokes and my sense of humor. I was not going to get any other kinds of job. So I just plowed ahead and didn't look back and I made an album. I remember my buddy Bill said, what do you do if this album doesn't do anything for you? I said, Well, I'm gonna make another one. And I wasn't even kidding. And then by the time Nancy came, and I had three albums, and I was we were sending them everywhere. I mean, by then we were making a little bit of money from governor's, but the three albums and they had cassettes that match them. And the promo, I can't even I couldn't exaggerate if I tried how many sets of those we sent out and I mean to everybody a such fringe. Like if I met a cab driver, I would say, you know, and the stories about that are a whole nother documentary. You wouldn't but the feedback was crazy. I in fact, I'll tell you a story about that. But one of those sets of three albums. You know, I was working in Washington, DC, they said this crazy man just got fired. He's going to New York, you should send your stuff I didn't know Howard Stern was I didn't listen to the radio. I wasn't you know, I listened the old days where I played my dirty job tapes are played the Eagles you know, and I just sent them blind to W NBC. Just like I sent my stuff blind everywhere. Like the way I hooked up with Rodney. I just sent him my jokes blind and he called me up. You got to be in it to win it. You know what I mean? I was just buying my own lottery tickets like an idiot. And we're like, there's every chance he wouldn't have never open that never gotten that. And people like, well, what would you have done if he hadn't open that? I don't know. But I would have kept throwing stuff against the wall till somebody did open it. There wasn't a master plan. There was a guy. I love the story. This I was playing at a golf outing out in Nyssa quad on Long Island was one of the most gorgeous, every hole is a postcard so fantastic. It's all these wealthy guys, but you know, the Baldwins charity, either Alec Baldwin to be their ability or Steven they took turns. And then mother Carol at a breast cancer charity and she was a delight. She loved my dick jokes. You know, it was just so I was in a good place there and those guys really loved me. So they're having a party. In contests and there's a whole group of guys, maybe 1020 guys all standing around. And this one guy goes, Jackie, come over here. I think you're gonna want to hear this. So I go over there. He says, All right, you guys, you got to hear this. In 1979 I was working as a cab driver in Fort Lauderdale. And I got a call to pick somebody up. Well, what happened was we were doing the show. And I always went on last because I was the loudest, and I was the filthiest and a couple girls invited us to a party. And the guy said, look, martling we're not going to sit here and watch you tell you stupid dick jokes. We're gonna go to the party. Here's the address. You could take a cab. I'm like, Yeah, all right, fine. That's fine by me. Because I get up there and I am drinking and I'm just having time my life. So I get done. And I call the cab says so I get a call to pick up this guy at a comedy club. He gets in the cab. And the first thing he does is he hands me a comedy out. He says here this is my comedy album. You really should listen to it. He says it was this was the first for me any we go to this party. I dropped them off. But he insists that I come in. So I go into the party. I get a little bombed smoke some pot. I need a girl. I get laid. I go home, I listen to this album. It's really really funny. In this on my first album, it said For Bookings Call and it had my home phone number. Because I lived in my mother's attic For Bookings Call 516922059. So he said, so I wanted to call and say thank you is I called up and this woman answered. And he said for 45 minutes, I had the greatest conversation I've ever had my life with this brilliant, funny, crazy woman It was my mother was sitting there alone. So she's got somebody on the phone, she's not gonna let him go. And I could almost cry, just just tell him the story. And that's just one of the zillions of just an album at random. And this guy, meanwhile, was an electrical contractor worth millions and millions of dollars. He says but that's his favorite story in his life, which it's like so many things in my life. It gets me nothing except gives me total joy. Which maybe is everything Jeff? You know, I'm not sure I'm not sure you know, you didn't say is $400

Jeff Dwoskin 47:14

You've had an amazing life of so many amazing stories and journeys. Thanks again for hanging out with me and sharing a ton of them. I love always when you're on the show.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 47:25

I just hope your listeners or your viewers enjoy it too.

Jeff Dwoskin 47:28

Oh, they Well, you've got a fan base so that I just I just ride your coattails that work. Oh, please. So joke, man, the documentary I think it's you can get it out pretty much anywhere like you guys can watch it on YouTube. You have to pay I mean, you can rent it from YouTube, Amazon, Vudu Apple TV,

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 47:48

loud people go to iTunes, all the connections all the names of all these places are on joke man movie.com Which is pretty self explanatory joke, man. movie.com Because obviously the name of the documentary is joke, man. I appreciate now I'll come on here anytime. Uh, you know, I always meant to ask you if I didn't ask you before. Where is Linkin Park? Is that anywhere in your vicinity? Or does that still exists?

Jeff Dwoskin 48:17

Yeah, I think it's about probably about half hour away from me. That was the

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 48:21

last the last week my college band ever played was in Lincoln Park where the motorcycle guys from Linkin Park. It was a motorcycle bar and the motorcycle guys in 1971 had just discovered LSD. So these motorcycle guys are tripping and beating the crap out of each other. I'll never forget because we're on stage playing war sister is just a shot away it just ended up beating the crap out of each other and owners like keep playing

Jeff Dwoskin 48:57

is to funny

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 48:59

enough I don't know why I just wanted to throw it. Linkin Park came up the other day because I guess that's the name of a rap group or something which I know nothing about. So

Jeff Dwoskin 49:08

Jackie, you're amazing continue to be amazing. And I'm sure you'll be back I feel like at this point like every year I do the podcast I have to have you back because now four times it's a record I mean, I've had a Billy Van Zandt spin on three maybe one or two on twice but you hold the record my friend.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 49:26

I am honored to to know that and I hope that there's somebody in Michigan that still remembers me if Bloomfield Chris Hoffman and Birmingham and Craig Jackman and John Allman and Bloomfield Hills. i That was my run. You know, you spent so much time in Detroit when you went to Michigan State. My best friend lived in. My roommate was from Lavanya and James was from I don't know, too many towns too many towns too much fun. Too much beer.

Jeff Dwoskin 49:56

I'm sure none of them for guy yo you don't seem to be the forgettable types. So I think you're I think, I think you're locked in there. Thank you, Jack.

Jackie "The Joke Man" Martling 50:04

Thank you, Jeff. I appreciate all right. How

Jeff Dwoskin 50:07

amazing was Jackie the joke man martling Fourth time on the podcast. I'm so honored. Definitely check out his documentary joke man has a link in the show notes. You can also go to joke man movie.com. Head on over to Amazon for his albums and books. So much Jackie the joke man, Martin. Thank goodness you can get your hands on. I don't want to keep you any longer. Besides with the interview over it means the episode is over. Can't believe it blew by so many great stories. Thanks again to my wonderful guest, Jackie, the joke, man martling. And of course, thank you to all of you for coming back week after week. It means the world to me, and I'll see you next time.

CTS Announcer 50:46

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Transcribed by https://otter.ai