#106 Blanca Blanco Is Breaking The Mold

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Jeff Dwoskin 0:16

Alright, John, thank you so much for that amazing introduction. You get the show going each and every week and this week was no exception. Welcome, everybody to Episode 106 of live from Detroit, the Jeff Dwoskin show. As always, I am your host Jeff Dwoskin. Great to have you back for another mind blowing episode of live from Detroit. This one is God at all. Hope you're ready for an amazing story because my guest today Blanca Blanco has an amazing story to tell. Blanca is the very definition of self made coming from nothing to reach great success as an award winning actress and fashion model. She has an incredible story to tell so much had to overcome in her life to reach the levels of success that she did. She wrote a book about it we're going to talk about it so prepare to be inspired my conversation with Blanca Blanca was coming up in just a few minutes.

I hope all of you caught last week's episode with Rajiv Satyal that was such a fun conversation and just a quick update. I'm still six continents behind is record setting comedy on all seven continents record I got a lot of emails DMS people are like Jeff for yeah, now I know you got one continent covered. What do you have your sights set on next? And I'm still kind of hovering at one right now to be honest with you not sure what my moves gonna be. I got people are making plans. But we'll see. We'll see what happens. We'll see what happens.

Oh, and some exciting news as well to share if you're listening to this on air date and you live in Michigan, or close to Michigan March 11. I'll be at the magic bag with Tammy paska tally. That's right. Tammy Pescatelli from Episode 96 of live from Detroit. We're together again. We work together while ago at Mark Ridley's and now we will be performing together at the magic bag theater. Search the magic bag. Ferndale, Michigan for tickets if you're in the area, if you're in the area, I would love to see you there.

Also update on episode 102. With Mike Binder. My wife listened to it. That episode doesn't listen all the episodes but she listened to that one. And lucky for me, that's the one where Mike binder makes fun of me not once but twice about the backdrop in my office. And my wife called me out on that she had a hilarious good time doing that. So thank you, Mike, do you want to hear the jabs live? Tune in to Episode 102 with Mike Binder, and you can make fun of me along with my wife.

And now it's time for the social media tip. All right, this is the fun part of the show where I share a little bit of my social media knowledge with a little 411 I picked up on the street. I've been in the social media game for years. And I think it's awesome when we can share information and all raise our social media game together. Today's tip is a primer of sorts. I've I was watching a video from the CEO of Instagram and he showed how to make an avatar for Instagram and Facebook through the Instagram settings so that when they get more immersed into the meta world, you have an avatar ready avatar being a digital representation of you that goes beyond just your profile photo. So in Instagram, you go to Settings, and then click on Account, then click on avatars. It'll take you through a whole process where you can choose your skin tone, your your head shape, your hair, glasses, eye color, etc, etc, etc. And you can create your own avatar that eventually you can use in different ways on Instagram and Facebook and the Metta World. I have no idea what that exactly means just yet, but I figured hey, you could have some fun getting it ready. And then when you're ready, then when all of it presents itself, we'll all be avatar prepared. And that's the social media tip.

I do want to thank everyone in advance for their support of the sponsors. When you support the sponsors. You're supporting us here live from Detroit, the Jeff Dwoskin show and that's how we keep the lights on today's interview sponsor is online bookstore near you. Let's call it Barnes and noble.com. Let's call it amazon.com specifically Blanca Blanco's book, Breaking The Mold. Grab your copy today, it surely will inspire you not convinced? Well guess what you will be after listening to my conversation with Blanca Blanco. We go through a lot of the threads of the book where Blanca outlines her life's struggles early on with poverty. later sexual abuse and then losing everything she owns in a fire lock has perseverance will surely inspire you. I'm excited to share my conversation that I had with her with you, ladies and gentlemen, Blanca Blanco.

Alright everyone, I'm excited to introduce you to my next guest, actress, author, model fashion icon. Blanca Blanco. How are you?

Blanca Blanco 5:27

Good. I'm doing great. Jeff, thank you so much for having me on your show. I'm so happy that you read my book.

Jeff Dwoskin 5:32

Yeah, I'm so happy that you wrote it. I'm really excited to talk to you about it. It's it's really inspirational. And I know you wrote it from you know, having such a pain in your background and and then using it to help other people. I think it's a it's a beautiful thing.

Blanca Blanco 5:48

It was definitely a passion project during the lockdown that I had time to reflect on my journey, my life journey. And I thought we need more stories of hope and resilience, because I'm seeing so much poverty and abuse and discrimination happening during the pandemic, that I thought it would be good to have stories of that inspires people like I can make changes. And as we're breaking the mold came about,

Jeff Dwoskin 6:17

it's amazing how much creativity came out of the pandemic, when we were all stuck at home, how many projects emerged and things that we just frankly never had time to do, all of a sudden, we had time to do and we were able to evolve in different ways and express ourselves in different ways. But in your book, you talked about being a young child falling asleep in a frigid garage, and you make a promise yourself that poverty is never going to define you. This is roughly when you're nine and you've already moved back from Mexico. But let's so let's go back and work up to that point. You were born in the United States, you moved to Mexico with your family, talk to me about the years in Mexico, those were the years that you with your family that you then work to get back to the US.

Blanca Blanco 7:04

I was born in Watsonville. And then we moved to Mexico. And when we were in Mexico, we were experiencing also poverty, but also there was a lot of violence. And so a lot of kids were getting kidnapped, kids were scared and like to hear in the news or the neighborhood talking about, you know, kids that are being kidnapped, and it was traumatic for me, for me and my siblings, we convinced my parents to move us to my grandma's to California. And so then we began telling everything. And it took us a few months because we also wish in the book, I explain how we had the funds to come to the US and then someone stole the money. So I began to help my family by doing it to like to start a stand, which is like a lemonade stand here in the US something like that. So and then my older brother and I would go and sell tacos and stuff on the street. Well, it was like a little bit of money. But my parents were able to finally get enough to move and then consider us. And we went with my grandma. And eventually my father got a job in Washington State as a migrant worker. And so he moved there first to get settled with a job. And then he brought us there. And we live in a car garage, we didn't have funds to rent a place. But you know, in the garage, had no heating, we had no hot water, the walls were so thin and it was like negative degrees. So I will go to sleep every night very cold in so I remember thinking like, I don't want to live like this for the rest of my life. So I that's where I developed a lot of determination. You know, I wanted to take action. So I knew that I couldn't control what was happening to me like living in poverty, and experiencing all this, you know, abuse and discrimination. But I could definitely be in control of our perception, the way that I see things. So I took action. I took steps every day, I wanted to break the cycle of poverty. I don't want to stay like this forever. And I don't want to be I don't want to take the bat, you know, the wrong path. either. I want to have a successful life. I want to be educated and also be an actress. So when you live in a garage, and you tell people like teachers that you want to be an actress in Hollywood look at you, like Jay was saying something realistic, you know? Just learn to say much about anymore and just prove actions.

Jeff Dwoskin 9:27

How did you take what they were saying to you and kind of push it aside and still push forward?

Blanca Blanco 9:33

I knew that I could either believe them or I could just say no, I'm gonna do my own path. I want to do this on my own. And I develop that skill of looking at things in a positive way. Even though I had a lot of negatives. I realized when I thought of my problems that I was experiencing as a child, it was harder, you know, to feel positive, but if I saw the problem comes as a challenge, then I was more determined gave me like, control. Like I'm, I'm taking these steps, and challenging myself giving me the termination. And I use that. So I, I learned to turn the barriers into challenges as a way of being able to look at it in a positive way. So I did that, as a little kid, people asked me, How did you do that? No, I didn't have a therapist. When I was a child. You know, I didn't have a therapist, I just pretty much learned that, by the way that I would feel things like Oh, well. But if I look at it like this, then I can, it gives me like a sense of power. So that's why I tell people like, even if you had a rough childhood, and you didn't have therapy, you learn I will skills, you know, we're here, we're capable of overcoming challenges. So and it is you can get therapist and adult put everything together, you know, but definitely I worked on myself before I even knew what the technical terms were. And then

Jeff Dwoskin 11:02

later when you went to school, use sort of that innate skills that you had a psychology and master's in social work degree, right?

Blanca Blanco 11:11

Yeah. And that's, that's another, you know, I have a bachelor's in psychology, and then I have my graduates in social work. But when I started with studying psychology, I was like, wow, I guess I mean, worked myself since I was a kid. But I didn't know technical terms, you know, but I was able to do things that were able to help me defense mechanism, you know, like, I was able to use that instead of coming. I mean, according to research, people that live in severe poverty and abuse and all these barriers, they're more likely to drop out of school, get pregnant early, for, you know, use drugs, with alcohol, it's like, all days, it's like, everything is against you, because these are according to the stats. And then I knew that I never liked those habits either. And I won, I wanted to break the, you know, I wanted to be phi, I didn't want to be part of that stat, I'm gonna make a new number. You know, like myself, like, I'm gonna just like, push and see, because I can feel and see far away my goals of what I was gonna do. Like I wanted to, you know, be an educated person, and also do acting. And people ask me, Well, why did you get your degrees and then you just use your mind for acting? No, I was just preparing was not going. I just I knew that growing up, the key to us changing our lifestyle was if we would have had, my parents would have had an education. When we were little, you know, we had limitations because the language barrier, and also no degrees from America, from the US, I knew that if we would have had that degrees, it would have changed. Many are lifestyle. So I knew that that was the key to success. And so just it took me longer to come to LA after I received my master's. But when I moved here, I had a sense of I had a strong foundation, like I'm able to handle, I'm prepared. And no matter what happens, like I'm not desperate, like if I don't book, something I feel secure, has been helping me a lot when I'm auditioning, and I try to be patient, and I'll be doing a lot of great films. And my career as an actress is, you know, doing very good. And I didn't have any family when I moved here, but in the industry, so it was just me, like with my dreams, you know. And so I navigated the system, and I learned to learn how it works. And that's what I just did you know what industry, I was able to have like a like I worked in hospice work when I first moved here, because I needed like a real job in the beginning you you're not in a union and there's not a lot of work, but I took each opportunity as a way of building my experience, like okay, I'll get a regular job and then like, I can fund my classes, my workshops, my headshots, everything that we need a snack or you know, like to have me prepared. So I did that. And so in the Union for for many years now and definitely it feels like I'm do accomplishing the goals that wonder as a child when I was in the garage, and I wanted to be an actress, and we will perform with my siblings in the garage, and just pretend you know, we're all these characters and it's a good feeling to be able to know how much difficult it was to be in that moment. But I gained so many skills, my adaptability skills, my growth and my strength.

Jeff Dwoskin 14:36

As you mentioned, I read the book and poverty wasn't the only thing that you were kind of working out of right so your your father was abusive.

Blanca Blanco 14:45

He wasn't abusive all the time. But he definitely he was very, um, he used your belt to hit me you use whip from Mexico. That was another reason why we wanted to come to the US because in Mexico, my father, he runs The police department so you can really call and file a report. And the whole recording at that time is just like not very common. And so when we can do the US, definitely, he knew that we could call the police. So he, he didn't use a whip, he will just use the Belter or issue, which is still pretty bad. But I'm just like, just to give you an idea, so I didn't tell any teachers about it. I was too ashamed, you know, like, it was just like, it was just embarrassing to me, like, I'm just like, your father supposed to be a protector, you know. So I just pretty much you know, I knew I had many challenges, but I didn't want them to stop me have a future. And then I knew that someday, I began speaking up, my father had a very traditional views, like women belong in the kitchen, like very, like old fashion. He didn't believe in education for women, or sports. So I did sports because I didn't understand why I couldn't. When my brother was doing it, I shared all this in my book. So I was constantly fighting for my own, you know, voice in, I was able to do sports in go to college, I went through a lot within the book, I describe the change, you know, the challenges I went through, in you know, what, you know, my father accepting that I was like an independent person. It's very interdependent in our culture, especially, you know, back in the days, I was very, like, everything I needed to do was like, as an independent person, you know, you go to university and had to break the mold. And that's what I did. That's why I called it breaking the mold, because I wanted it you break that mold, you break the pattern of every area, every chapter, even though there's so many, you know, challenges are sold with hope and courage, every shopper, like it's not just like, oh God, a book that is about like, all these bad things. It's about like, the bad things, but also what my lessons were, what tools I applied to help me get through it. And even now, so this is like continuing with the roller coaster, you know, you have the roller coaster, but then you are like, not quitting, you know, like, you're gonna keep going. That's the whole idea of my book.

Jeff Dwoskin 17:10

Yeah, it does. It bounces between like autobiography and self help.

Blanca Blanco 17:15

And I just thought with, you know, being when I was experiencing, you know, the abuse or just discrimination, I reminded myself, I worked on taking steps have just been, you know, like, positive affirmations, you know, things like, you know, I'm a strong person, like, I will kind of just remind myself, even though I didn't believe in X, you know, because it's like, why so many things, but everyday, I just worked on being kinder to myself talking positive reframing, you know, reframing was something that pretty much is in every chapter. Like, that's how I overcame and many of the obstacles but just say, knowing that I'm gonna, I'm gonna say pool is who I am, and I'm proud and whatever other people believe is their problem. My life choices. My thoughts and actions are only controlled by me, not other people.

Jeff Dwoskin 18:05

Right. But it's a hard thing to to overcome. I mean, I know you mentioned in the book being bullied and racist, racist stuff, you know, especially in high school, but then going back and and helping people in high school, learn from the stories and the tools that you have in the book. So I know I hated high school, not to nothing compares to what you just I was. I was just a dork and I didn't love it, but like, but even just walking into it, or when I see someone from there, I'm like, Ah, so you know, I know. Like, it triggers fast, especially anything from those days triggers you.

Blanca Blanco 18:42

Yeah, it does. There's a lot of trauma associated with high school. Hey, I know that for me, like I was in fifth grade. I remember I would get kids would make fun of me because I was ethnic. I was from somewhere else. My name was funny. All these things that were saying are you have bushy eyebrows, like you know, all these things that are like when you're a kid like affects you and you don't understand why they're like, you know, being mean to you when you're just being nice to them, you know, but you know, what time do you realize the more you ignore people, they they go and bully someone else indefinitely. They're just projecting their own insecurities. And it takes time for us when you're being bullied to understand that though, like, I knew that being an immigrant family was another factor for being bullied living in poverty and other like, Oh, you don't have your closest ripped Oh, you don't have the nice outfits. So it's like everyday I used to hate going to school. I just wanted to just not ever go to school but I had to do it because if I did, then I was gonna be part of this wasn't complete anything

Jeff Dwoskin 19:51

and you broke the mold. There you go. Yeah, again. Okay. So poverty, your father, but that's not all. You also overcame a rough start. And when you came to LA to start in the business, right, you, you ran into fake producers that that sexually assaulted you. And you had to then deal with

Blanca Blanco 20:08

that. Now, when I moved here, I mean, definitely I experience I remember one time I went to this audition, I went through the proper channels, like, you know, the agents and managers, and it was supposed to be for a project for a studio, but I like I didn't mention the studio because I don't want it was not the studio it was, um, basically so I only wanted to share that. So any actors are read always like, keep in mind, trust your instinct, because I remember I just felt very uncomfortable and like both is that there were so many things that were that had red flags, but I also wanted to have like, well, you know, their agents, their managers, they've been around for years. I'm like, new here, like, so I kind of, you know, took us that perspective. But I still took Brian with me too, when I booked the job, and I went there, and definitely the locations everything that was selected, didn't have any cameras, even the hotel and so I shared that in the book, how the it was just basically one producer that is not really a producer, you know, yeah, he tried to assault me and hurt me physically to like, when I tried to escape, I got in my car and he slammed the the door in my legs, and I was bleeding, but I was able to escape and I punched him in the in his middle part. And I got away but but I just it was a struggle. And then I filed a police report. And then I did go through the studio, the the official claimed and they had a claim and they investigated and they were very concerned because he they everything was so perfect, organized documents and staff contracts. And it's like, wow, so I didn't get the support from the studio that we're supposed to be it was that and they were very reaching out making sure I was okay. But it was obviously not something that you know, I hire some instincts. And I took a friend and I still got the myosin but then I thought well, no, I'm not gonna just I'm gonna take action. I'm gonna, you know, make sure the whole you know the studio and get please and stop because this is obviously gonna happen to someone else. And I got lucky, I was able to escape,

Jeff Dwoskin 22:14

thank goodness, just minor injury and did they ever get the guy? No,

Blanca Blanco 22:19

they never did. And, and you know, I didn't even get his name because when it's been many years ago, but like, I haven't no idea what his full name is. And so and I have no picture, it's not gonna keep my own limited picture of you. So I have record of like, and so it was definitely something that I just wanted to share this and like book just to show people that what we went through sometimes in the beginning or even any anytime. I mean, we have like that, you know, so many things going on with in Hollywood was something that, you know, I just thought I was sharing my lessons here on this chapter. And it was a scam,

Jeff Dwoskin 22:56

when you were sharing that story that a lot of people come out and share similar stories that they've had, is it how rampid is that kind of thing in the in the industry to that they prey on on women like that,

Blanca Blanco 23:09

you know, that type of behavior. It's very common after Harvey Weinstein, more people are being careful and especially men that are using their power to you know, with women and especially when they have a position that they can just do that, like they feel they can but now in the last few years things have been better like I feel they have been improving where people are more producer or anyone in the industry is careful how they approach people because you know, it's like people are speaking up I was very happy to see the me to campaign people speaking up about their struggles and very happy that that's happening because that is like a shift in the industry because of that has been around for years

Jeff Dwoskin 23:56

have you been involved with the industry to help shed light on it outside of mentioning it in your book

Blanca Blanco 24:02

I support people that are opening up they're you know, sharing their experiences and there's not much you know, just speaking up that's all we can do you know one sort of enhance

Jeff Dwoskin 24:13

but that's not all you also talk about you lost everything your home in in the Woolsey fire Yes, I came in Imagine that. It's just so tragic to Dell idea of just everything you have burning away like that.

Blanca Blanco 24:29

Yeah, it was definitely another traumatic tragic moment because I lost my entire home with everything and I share my book breaking the mold the journey from escaping from the fire because it was I didn't know if I was gonna make it. And so I only took one carry on with legal documents and I honestly didn't think nothing was gonna happen. Like you said, Oh, what are the chances that we'll get here? And then once you know the long journey that I have in my book about everything that went through was an escaping and the anxiety To the fire, like close to my cars, sparks on my windshields and pitch black even those morning, you know, once I escape and I was able to sit down, I went to a place to look to save the news. And that's when I saw as the first five minutes, I see my house burning on TV. And so I talk about that. But one of the things that I had the comfort knowing that I was I was and people that were, you know, my close to me were safe. I remember from my childhood, I was able to do so much. And I now I have knowledge and experience. I have a strong foundation, I can definitely recover from this. So I had that comfort. Like I was doing interviews and stuff. And I was doing all everything. And I'm just like people like, well, you handled it pretty well. And I'm like, Well, I had like worse experiences from my childhood. Like, you know, like, I was just like, Yeah, this is material stuff I can obtain, you know, I'm alive, I can do that. I mean, I was the only thing that it was the family pictures or my book collection because I am like a bookworm. I like to read every day. So I had all my books for college and just what I accumulated and that was very, like, difficult, like all my books, I miss my books, and my pictures. But that was just like, you know, obviously I can I order a few of my books that I had. And so after I moved into a place, but also, when you lose at home, you can order anything on Amazon because you don't have an address. And so I remember odor wanting to order some stuff. And I'm like, Oh, I can't look for my bunny little house. And I couldn't because hotels are they don't let you use your address for delivery. Even if they know there's like a situation that it's not like I'm just once there, I just want their address for no reason. So I learned a lot of lessons from that.

Jeff Dwoskin 26:51

It was interesting. I when I was reading that chapter, because you had 10 minutes, you didn't have a huge warning, they were like you gotta be out here. Now you got like 10 minutes to evacuate your house. And so in that 10 minutes, you had to decide what to bring from a house that you may never have be able to go back to which and as it turned out you couldn't because of the fire but it brings up an interesting thing. Like I started thinking myself what would I grab? You know you started it's an interesting kind of thing that kind of run through your head if you only had that moment what is important to you, what is the thing that you're going to grab? It's it was it was essentially got me thinking got me thinking? Well, that's

Blanca Blanco 27:33

good because that was you know, growing up in leadership class or just anywhere like oh, what would you take if you had a fire? You could take like 10 things that you think about oh, I will take this I will take that but the reality is when you're in that moment, you have the emotional like the fear and then you have the you can really do all over the place with emotions, so you're not really thinking straight that even if you had it plan like dude like oh my god, you gotta get your bunny you gotta get your you know, like you're thinking everything that it's not as clear thinking when you know that there's a fire coming your way. You know what I learned? Because I didn't take any of my jewelry. I didn't take anything pretty much I just took one outfit in my carry on and later once I you know everything happened I remember I thought about oh, I should I should have brought this Oh, but it's just like impossible unless you have a list on your house on the fridge. Okay, and it doesn't fire take this, I think that's effective because then you can get it and be like, Okay, I just for me getting the legal documents was important because I was gonna travel, Marrakech in two days, I mean, within two weeks for

Jeff Dwoskin 28:42

write the things that are hard to get back because even in like in your exercise you just mentioned we say pick 10 things, not only 10 things, it's 10 things that you could carry and put into that car based on the amount of people who are also in their car grabbing their things

Blanca Blanco 28:59

is not realistic because you could be Oh, I'm gonna take you know the you know, my grandma's machine you know, like sewing machine like all these things and you only have one carry on like it's almost like everything goes out the window like all the ideas that you might have, but I know for me I like I just in that moment I was I was scattered confused like oh my gosh, well maybe it's not gonna happen whatever you know, I feeling it's gonna happen so then because what are the chances that you know that is gonna get here this you know, you're like in denial, you know? So that's what I I have people say, Oh my God, I want to take in all my jewelry and say, Well, you were not there. You know, when you're there in that moment. You're gonna you can take whatever you want, but don't judge people for not taking their jewelry like it's like I didn't stay there looking for things so I could get in trouble. You know,

Jeff Dwoskin 29:51

I'm guessing here for a second but growing up with close to nothing and poverty. Your thoughts on things are different than somebody who has grew up with tons of stuff around them

Blanca Blanco 30:02

is true because people are grow up having everything not having to work for anything. They don't know how capable they are of doing anything like that. Like I knew I was capable of collecting everything I need. Again, I had the skills I did it before, so I can do it again. It was just like, hard that a lot of my books were or pictures, but I thought I could order the books ever again. And the pictures will least we have some pictures still, you know, on my parents house, I kind of had to look at it like that, like, in a positive way. Because the reality is that it was gone. So I can be like dwelling on the negative. You know, what is the point?

Jeff Dwoskin 30:41

That totally makes sense. And then you talk about as you're finishing up the book, your mom passed away very sorry about that. So that that must have been hard. She was an important part of the whole story. He was

Blanca Blanco 30:52

the she was basically the backbone of the book. You know, she was she was my rock my entire life. She supported all my decisions matter how crazy my ideas work, she were encouraged them, and she will never tell me oh, you know, that's to thinking too much like to tell her I'm gonna go and be an Hollywood actress, she would actually say, Well, you know, just keep working on it. Like, I don't think she believed that was gonna happen, you know, nobody in our family or anyone I knew were in the industry. So, but I found a way you know, and so she was very involved in my book process, like, I will share with her every chapter I was doing, like, we would have zooms, and I will be like, hey, so I'm, I just finished this chapter. And she was very happy that I wrote my book, because when I was a child, I had journals. And she would tell me, tell me, like, you know, you can always like, you know, she will give me a journal. So every year because I wanted to eventually buy a book, though, she was happy that I was doing that. And before she passed away, I read her some of the book and she was very happy. And she pointed out some stuff that I forgot, like little details and like, oh, like when we live in the garage. She's like, Oh, remember when you will get blisters in your hands from the cold water. Oh, I totally forgot about that, you know, like, okay, and then I went back and I added some details that was very, it is the most difficult pain I ever experienced losing my mom. But I was happy that I was able to be with her a month before she passed away. And I took care of her and I helped her work on her last wishes or to do list that you wanted to do. I made sure that she completed everything. So by the time she finished her to want it to do she died within a day. So I knew that once we completed our her list that she probably was going to be ready to go, she wouldn't be ready. And there's not much we can do. You can keep people they you know, when they're ready to go. They're they're ready. And she was even though she was young, she was 62. He had a she didn't have COVID She had heart condition, heart failure and kidney failure. Like last minute, all of a sudden she had that. And so she had a heart attack. 10 years ago, she was doing checkups, and all of a sudden my after checkup, everything declined. So we had to go through we went through the hospital during the COVID You know, where we couldn't be with her because in the night or day, like only one person so there was no switching. You know, we're like a family of seven. I when the doctor told her that she was she had two weeks to live, I was the one that I went to the meeting and I was there with her. And I was able to help her through the process and guide my siblings. That's what I did in hospice. When I did hospice in Los Angeles, I I helped my patients and the families through the end of life process. I think that's why I ended up doing the job because it was going to prepare me to be able to help my mom, you know, other siblings were all involved, but everybody had different skills. One of my siblings, you know, just couldn't really handle the the news from the doctor or that type of conversation. So put her in a different, you know, to do other stuff. And I was okay with that. Because I wanted to make sure we had a good plan for my mom, you know, make sure that when she's getting home for under hospice care that we have everything in place in all the resources that we need. So I was pretty much like, you know, in control as far as taking care of my mom when she goes home. I talked in my book about I talked about that experience the whole of loss because this woman I'm being I was told about it like I was working in in Atlanta, and I took the plane, I was doing laundry actually when I got the call and I just I was at a hotel because I was filming there. I don't live there. When I got the call. I remember you know, there's not a lot of details I can get my feelings. I don't know what to ask, you know, like, what is like, you know, from the doctors, I don't know what kind of questions they should be asking. So I said, Okay, I'm flying out today I asked my brother to buy me that to book my flight because I'm like, I'm stressed. I want to make sure have the right date and stuff. have, you know, he was able to do that for me and I just got my clothes from out of the washer and I flew with a suitcase full of wet clothes. And I just went straight to the hospital. And and yeah, it was terminal. So I so I knew that that was the case that my siblings couldn't get that information. They were like in a bit of denial. Yeah, so I know. But I share also like, what helped me through those moments and my health, how the dynamic in my family changed, but like things like tips that were helpful for me that hopefully it can help other people because the things that everything's new when you're going to lose a parent, because you never we only have a set of parents. So it's not like we have so much experience. So I share the steps that I was able to take to even with the grieving process also,

Jeff Dwoskin 35:48

it's beautiful that your your mom was a rock for you your whole life and then at the end, you are able to be return that favor and be Iraq for her. And that's it's beautiful. It's great that it's funny, isn't it? How like when when somebody is ready to go, they go, she finished the list. And then they're like my grandfather, we all visited and then once he had said goodbye to everyone, then he died that night. It was I think just there's something that happens I think with the body when something can be completed on this this plane, they're ready to go to the next

Blanca Blanco 36:19

when I worked in hospice, I saw patterns like that also, like a lot of patients will wait till after the holidays, they're ready to go by we'll wait for the last Christmas the last New Year's Eve and then we had so many deaths in in January. So people work very hard to keep to stay alive for the last for their family.

Jeff Dwoskin 36:41

It's amazing how the that all works. I don't know what it is what our the universe but it's, it is amazing

Blanca Blanco 36:47

that they have even at the end, they work so hard. They know that it's gonna happen, but they just hold on for that moment. Like we did a Christmas in June with my mom. She brought gifts for everyone and we opened gifts. It was like bittersweet because we know she's gonna die soon. We have footage of everything as opening gifts and she's smiling when it gets in there gives us everything.

Jeff Dwoskin 37:15

But that's great that did your your mom knew she was at the end too. Yeah, she

Blanca Blanco 37:19

knew she was she was very strong man. She knew that. She was very spiritual. So she would say well, if this is what God wants, I know it's I'm not gonna fight it. You know, he believed that and day before she passed away we after we finished all the lists her move her legs at all. And she looked at me and she's like, I'm getting worse. But like when I saw the fear in her eyes, like she she knew and after that she heard herself

Jeff Dwoskin 37:46

well God bless you for being there and helping her through that and it's It's so touching. Yeah, I feel like we've talked about all the adversity let's talk about your let's talk about no I don't Yeah, I really interesting that you studied acting with Gordon Heinz. That's how enhance dad for 10 years. I thought that was interesting.

Blanca Blanco 38:05

Yes, Gordon on he was my mentor and my teacher for many years I perform every week. And he was just such a wonderful person. Like he would tell us when you finish your auditions, you just drive home, forget about it. Don't think if out there I booked it or not. Like it's just an opportunity that we had and let it go. So he kind of trained us think like that, because you know, when in the beginning, we don't have a lot of experience. But like the chances are if you do 10 auditions, you may get one call back not personal is just the way that the stats are, he really made my life easier by showing me the numbers, how it works. And then I just have to work on whatever I'm able to have control. Like I can prepare for it. I can take workshop, you know, I keep building my skills. So what I will do after every audition, I've removed the whole Oh my God, why did I do this? Why did I do that? I removed that instead I looked at it like Okay, so what did I like about the audition? But what can I do to improve for next time? So okay, the ones that I started with that the things that I did that I did good because anytime you want to try to change the behavior, you want to keep motivated, keep the motivation going. So I I said okay, I did good here, here and there. Okay, so then Then what should I be working on next? So then I will take like three things from the addition I want to improve. So then I work for my next addition, I move in and not repeating the same things. So every addition I'm like, reflecting on the next one, trying to just keep improving my skills. That's what I did. So I now I will to do a self tape, which is the new normal or I can just do an addition and I just say like okay, oh, I like this and Okay, I will work on this or next time, you know, or I don't like feel like oh my god, like it was really good that he was my mentor, you know, and I also want work with Sally Kirkland for many years, and I've had many great coaches.

Jeff Dwoskin 40:04

That's amazing. And then I mean your IMDB is just fall so that's they must have have touched you very well.

Blanca Blanco 40:12

Yeah, I mean, another thing for that whenever I work on a project, I feel like it's a privilege to Beaver as I know the odds are being there is pretty low. I appreciate when I'm on set. I really

Jeff Dwoskin 40:25

appreciate you spending time with me and talking about your story and your book. It's It's so inspiring. I can't thank you enough. Where can people keep up with you on social medias

Blanca Blanco 40:35

on Instagram at blank Lambo, actress on Twitter, just my name Blanco Blanco. I do have a website just Blanca blanca.com. So pretty much just some everywhere. Social media wise,

Jeff Dwoskin 40:49

awesome. Well, thank you so much. I really appreciate it. Oh, thank

Blanca Blanco 40:53

you. And then also just to you know, just to let you guys know, my book is at Barnes and Noble and also on Amazon breaking the mold.

Jeff Dwoskin 41:02

Yes, I definitely everyone. I'll put links to it in the show notes as well. So everyone can link directly to it when you go to a Barnes and Noble now if you walk into you, like move your book around, so it's sitting out there.

Blanca Blanco 41:15

Yes, mix. Here's my kidding.

Jeff Dwoskin 41:18

That's it. Thank you so much. Thanks.

How amazing was Blanca Blanco's story. It's hard not to be inspired by the level of perseverance, and focus Blanca had to ultimately find success. Definitely check out her book breaking the mold. You can get it online. amazon.com Barnes and noble.com Oh, you're top book.com Oh, wait, you break in the mold?

Well, with the interview over I can only mean one thing. That's right. It's time for another trending hashtag when the family of hashtags at hashtag are round up. Follow us on Twitter at Hashtag Roundup, download the free hashtag roundup app at the Apple or Google App Play stores get notified every time a hashtag game starts never miss a game tweet along with us and one day one of your tweets may show up on a future episode of live from Detroit. The Jeff Dwoskin show fame and fortune awaits you. Today's hashtag is meant to inspire just like Blanca Blanca's book is meant to inspire the hashtag #WishIWouldHave is brought to us by healing with hashtags a weekly Game On hashtag roundup. it's a reflection tag. What do you wish you may have done differently?

Alright, let's dive in #WishIWouldHave I wish I would have stood up for myself a bit more in life. I wish I would have learned the first time I wish I would have stopped and looked around once in a while. I wish I would have learned earlier in life that green grass on the other side of the fence is often astroturf. I wish I would have listened to my heart less and my intuition more. I wish I would have held my tongue instead of bickering with my sister. But sometimes I have no filter and our final #WishIWouldHave. I wish I would have valued myself more when I was younger. All great mantras that I read, and they're all retweeted at Jeff Dwoskin show on Twitter, Go show him some love. Let me know if you resonate with the message that they sent through that hashtag. I'm sure they would love to hear from you.

Well with the interview over and now the hashtag complete that can only mean one thing. That's right. We've come to the end of another episode. Episode 106 is coming to a close. Where does the time go? I love hanging out with you all week after week. Special thanks again to my guest Blanca Blanco, and of course huge thanks to all of you for coming back week after week. I can't thank you enough. It means the world to me, and I'll see you next time.

Announcer 43:52

Thanks so much for listening to this episode of the Jeff Dwoskin show with your host Jeff Dwoskin. Now go repeat everything you've heard and sound like a genius. Catch us online at the Jeff Dwoskin show.com or follow us on Twitter at Jeff Dwoskin show and we'll see you next time

Transcribed by https://otter.ai